Old women in queues

I always aim to be pleasant and nice to old people for no other reason than the fact that they are old, yet old women in queues really push me to the edge of my sanity,  to the point where I'm struggling to restrain myself from either shouting at her to hurry up or just pushing her out of my way. Its not just because they are slow its the entire ordeal of the occasion. It is even worse when I am serving them because I'm required to smile through gritted teeth the entire time she flaps about.

Yes, I do understand that a trip to the shops is the social highlight of her week but nobody has the time or interest to hear about her bad knee or mangy cat that died over a decade ago, if you want a conversation join a knitting club or coffee morning, do not join a queue and decide that the poor checkout assistant has any interest in your life story, people have places to be and jobs to do and although I feel sorry about your lack of life, a queue is never the time or place, because every minute you chatter on another person joins the ever growing  ridiculously long queue. I personally think that many of these old hags women purposely cause this unnecessary scene in an attempt to get the checkout assistant to snap and shout at her purely so she can go home and write a complaint, a task that I'm sure she relishes.

It makes me livid when instead of having her purse out ready to pay for her purchase, she waits until every single thing has been scanned through and packed before even considering rummaging around in her densely packed, threadbare handbag to retrieve her purse. 

She then proceeds to count it all out in spare change until she finds that shes 4p short and that maybe it would make sense to pay for her £9.85 worth of stuff with a ten pound note. By this point I don't even bother trying to stifle my huffs and mutterings because this woman has lived her life yet she seems intent on wasting mine and deserves to know that her flapping around is NOT socially acceptable!